


New Beginnings

by AllisonDiamond



Category: iZombie (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Feels, Based on a Tumblr Post, Childhood Trauma, Comfort/Angst, Confused Liv Moore, F/M, Feelings, Gift Fic, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Inappropriate Humor, Memory Loss, My First Work in This Fandom, Nice Blaine Debeers, Not Canon Compliant, Ravi Only Appears In One Scene, Ravi/Peyton Are A Thing, Repressed Memories, Slow Build, Slow Burn, sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-07
Updated: 2017-01-07
Packaged: 2018-09-15 11:27:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9233165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AllisonDiamond/pseuds/AllisonDiamond
Summary: Blaine shows up and asks Liv if it's normal to crave brains. Takes place sometime during S2 (doesn't follow most of S2 events).





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MercyItsCirce](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MercyItsCirce/gifts).



 

Liv smiled as she turned the knob slightly and stepped into the ME office. She loved her job here, mostly for the brains, and the misadventures in crime solving. Ooh, maybe she’d get to try a columnist, hearing the woes and follies of people’s love lives. What fun! 

She switched the lights on and chuckled quietly to herself. Ravi wasn’t here? He was always here earlier than her. _Oh_ , her brain supplied, _must be doing the freaky with Peyton._ She gagged. Definitely didn't need to get the picture burned into her brain. Naked Ravi and naked Peyton — _god, no!_ She didn't need that in her life. She was not thinking of ‘mom’ and ‘dad’ doing the nasty. N’awww!

“I’ve been waiting for you.”

Liv placed a hand on her chest, as she tried to calm her beating heart down. _What was Blaine doing here?_ She hardened immediately at the thought. _The bastard was stalking her again._

She turned around and faced him. She was going to give the self-centered, egotist, psycho bastard a piece of her mind. Blaine Debeers was going to be sorry he ever stepped into her office — her personal space. 

They had a deal!

But of course, the jerk would break it for some unquestionable hidden agenda. And here she was thankful that she hadn't seen him for _nearly_ a week. What dumb luck that turned out to be!

Liv looked at him harshly and warily. Blaine wasn't here to pay her a friendly visit. No, he was here to threaten her, to blackmail her in giving him more brains, or something like that. She wasn't going to aid him in killing innocent people to satisfy hisso-called _clients._

He was twirling around in the chair, his hands pressed firmly on both ledges of it, and he was laughing like a child. He seemed _happy_ , almost at peace, like he was a different person. None of that smugness, that cockiness, or that bad boy vibe were there.

What was he playing at?

“You should try this. It’s fun,” he said breathlessly. “ Takes a lot of you, though. I need a minute.” He placed a hand on his chest to balance himself when he nearly fell off the chair. “Are you Liv Moore?” He cocked an eyebrow and watched her intensely, with the gaze of a curious lazy cat.

What the heck? If he had believed that for one second that she was going to buy his ‘act,’ he was dead wrong. She wasn’t going to get dragged into his mess any further and she was never going to help him again. She had learned her lesson the hard way; nothing good ever came from helping the likes of Blaine Debeers. 

“Drop the act, Blaine. What do you want?” she said harshly, as her eyes glowed red at him. She was ready to hurt him, if that was what it took to get him out of her life for good.

“Did I do something to you?” He looked hurt and sorry. “I’m sorry. The past me I’m learning was an ass. Can’t we start over fresh? Forget anything that might have happened before?”

What the heck? She burned with fury. She was going to rip him apart, if he didn’t come clean with her. She hadn't had the time to deal with this crap.

“Tell me what you want or get out of my office!” She glared at it. “I don’t have the time to deal with any more of your crap.”

He watched her and swallowed. “I’m sorry. I really must have been an ass to you to get this type of reaction. I’m a changed man now, Liv. You don’t have to worry about me doin’ whatever I had done to you previously ever again.”

“Blaine, talk. I’m runnin’ out of time.” She was really running out of patience.

He stared at her, searching her face for something, before he actually spoke. “Don-E said you’d be the best person to explain my current predicament.”

“What are you talkin’ ‘bout?”

“The brains?” He locked eyes with her. “I woke up cravin’ brains. I nearly cracked this guy’s skull open ‘coz I was so hungry. Can you explain that to me?” He looked horrified. “Why would I do somethin’ as awful as that?”

“What?” She scrunched up her face. “Why are you really here?” 

She didn't trust him to believe anything that dropped out of his mouth. He was a good actor, that she was going to give him. She wasn’t falling for his lies. They were so obvious.

He bit his lower lips. “You’re like me, aren’t you? You’ve the hair—” He pointed to her. “—the red eyes — do you also crave brains _like_ if you really need to have it? I swear I don’t know what this is. I won’t lie to you ‘bout somethin’ messed up like this.”

She folded her arms across her chest and waited for him to come clean with her.

He didn’t.

He just continued staring at her, as if she had all of the answers in the world. She didn’t. She was some wise-cracking scholar, and if she were one, she wouldn’t help him.

“C’mon, Liv, you gotta help me,” he pleaded desperately in a surprisedly normal voice, and his eyes got all soft and yearning. “I don’t know if there’s somthin’ wrong with me. If I should check myself in to a mental institutional. Is cravin’ brain normal? Do you crave brains, too?”

What the heck was his deal?

“Blaine,” she began slowly, as if she were taking to a kid, “did you wake up from the wrong side of the bed or somethin’? Go home. I can’t help you.”

He opened his mouth to say something, but then closed it.

He ran a hand through his thick, smooth blond hair crazily and then started tugging at it painfully. “ _Oh, god, I am crazy!_ ” His eyes turned all wild and panicky. He got up from the chair and started to walk over and over and over down the small space in the MD office. “I am crazy! I really am.” 

She sighed. She had to stop him before he hurt himself. She might not like the guy, but she wasn’t going to let him hurt himself. Even a corrupted mind like his didn't deserve that.

She rushed over to him and he collapsed to the floor in a mess. Hair all wild, eyes crazy, body limp, and hands covering his face.

_That was some kind of brain he had ate,_ she thought as she shook him hard, trying to get him out of this, whatever this was.

It didn’t work. What the heck? None of the brains she ate had this effect of her, and she ate a lot of weird ones; that brain must belong to one very paranoiac person.

“Blaine,” she said, going for a soothing voice, because he was breathing heavily, too heavily, chest puffing out and in. “Snap out of it! It’s just the brain — you can’t let it take completely control of you.”

He seemed to not hear her and he moved back until his back was pressed against the stone cold wall. His back hit the wall pretty hard. He groaned.

“Please _don’t_ lock me up,” he begged her; his voice soft and low. “I _can’t_ go through that again. Please _don’t_ leave me here alone. I _don’t_ like the dark. Please, I won’t do it again, daddy.”

Liv’s eyes got soft and pained but she didn't allow herself to feel anything for him. This _was_ clearly an act, a very good one, but an act nonetheless. And here she was, actually wanting to help him, but that was the last time she was going to allow him to pull her heartstrings.

“I promise I _will_ be a good boy,” he continued, as he started to rock back and forth; his back hitting the wall continually. “Please, I _will_ never disappoint you again. I _will_ be a good boy, daddy, please _don’t_ lock me in the cellar,” he finished, as his voice caught in his throat. He started to whimper quietly, clearly trying to hold it all in.

Liv’s heart grew three sizes bigger in her chest. No, she mustn't get all teary and emotionally — he wasn’t worth it. But this didn't feel like an act. _No, Liv, get a grip on yourself_ , she warned herself, as she took inBlaine, her arch-nemesis, breaking down.

This was all an act.

But then why did it feel so real?

If this was real, she was being a horrible person, but then again, it was Blaine. When it came to Blaine Debeers, she didn't knew what was real with him, or what wasn’t. 

She sighed and leaned in closer to him until they were inches apart. She couldn't just leave him to suffer like this. She was going to regret this, but unlike him, she was a nice person.

“Hey, Blaine,” she said softly but sternly enough to try to get to snap out of whatever this was. “You _are_ safe here. No one is goin’ lock you up, okay?” She cupped his face gently in her hands. He relaxed, however slightly that was, at her touch. “I promise you that, yeah?” She offered him a small smile.

He _did not_ stop shaking, nor did he look up at her. He was still stuck into his world. The deeper he had sunk into this nightmarish hell, the more she began to feel like this wasn’t an act. Blaine would have pull of it by now, if it were real.

“Blaine,” she tried again, turning him to face him, and when he collapsed into her open arms, she let him. “You _aren’t_ there anymore, okay? So, please snap out of it.”

Her heart broke at the sight at his quiet, broken sobs.

“Hey, it’s okay.” She gently rubbed his back to comfort him. “I promise you _won’t_ go through anything like that ever again. Your dad _isn’t_ here.”

He continued sobbing softly into her shoulders. “Please _don’t_ leave me here. Please, daddy, please. Daddy! Daddy, daddy, daddy! Please come back!” he started shouting; voice so broken and conflicted. She felt him tensing up in her arms. “You can’t leave me here,” he whispered and started to shake violently.

It took everything she had in him to stop him from hurting himself any further, and her, too. She tightened her hold on him until he calmed down.

“Blaine, stop!” She held him until both of her hands went numb with pain. “Whatever you’re reliving — look, none of it is real, okay? So, please _snap_ out of it. I _can’t_ talk about being a zombie, if you don’t come out of this.”

It was a lame try, but he did say that he came to see her about ‘brains.” A small part of her began to think that might have been true, but how was that even possible? Blaine had been a zombie longer than her. He was the one who turned her!

She sighed. 

Blaine wasn't stepping out of this mindset and it was scaring her. This was clearly childhood trauma; that explained why he was such a psycho. 

_But_ , she thought, her mind closing down on her, _if he doesn’t snap out of this mindset soon, he’s going to be stuck there for a while._ This was bad. Worse than the time she baked ‘brain’ bread. That was a horrible experience. 

“Blaine, please, you gotta to snap out of it!”

He trembled in her hands. She wished she could feel his forehead to see if he had a fever, but she was afraid any sudden movement might cause him great discomfort. She didn't want to increase his pain. 

After a few minutes of silence, Blaine stopped going into all of these fits, and he relaxed in her hands completely. Liv was so glad. It was hard enough actually seeing him reliving what must have been a really terrifying childhood. 

Then, she heard something. She focused in on the sound, and it was the sound of jiggling keys. She turned around and saw the knob turning. Crap, Ravi was here already! 

How was she going to explain this? She looked at a peaceful and serene Blaine, limp in her hands. Crap! This wasn't good.

“Didn’t had any last night, Liv?” Ravi asked in his light, chipped voice, as he moved around the lab. “‘Cause I had plenty enough for the both of us. God, that came out wrong!”

Liv gulped nervously, as she kept her hand on Blaine’s mouth, trying to get him to calm down. That was working out fantastically.

“Liv? You there? ‘Cause if you aren’t then I’m in big trouble.”

She sighed. Ravi was going to find her sooner or later; it was better he saw her even if she was comforting Blaine.

“Here, Ravi!” she called out. She felt Blaine tensing up in her arms again. Great! How can cheerful Ravi cause that? 

Ravi came to her and stopped dead in his track, the tube slipping from his hands.

“Liv, is that—”

“Blaine, yeah,” she finished for him. “He was here when I got here.”

“Oh,” he said and pressed a hand to his forehead. “So, you know?”

“Know what?” 

“That he isn’t a zombie anymore.” He looked at her for recognition. “Oh,” he said, as his eyes rolled back in his face, “you didn't know.”

“What? Blaine is—” She tried to wrap her head around this. That didn't explain anything because Blaine clearly said he ‘craved’ brains, his words, not hers. “How is that even possible?”

“I gave him, well, he battled me for the cure. I won, of course! But he got the cure from me, and well, you can figure out the rest.”

“Ravi!”

“It wasn’t my fault! He stormed into my office!” Ravi defended himself in a freakishly cute way, with both of his hands on his hips, the crinkling of his brows, the small twitching in his nose, the cute flaring in his eyes, and the pouting. 

Liv sighed. She honestly didn't care about that anymore. Ravi didn't give her the cure, but he gave it to Blaine. Clearly, that didn't work, seeing as it drove Blaine straight down memory loss, and nightmare town.

“Ravi, we’ll talk ‘bout this later. Just help me with, Blaine, now,” she said in a defeated voice, as she tried to untangle herself from Blaine, but he wasn’t letting go of her.

“Okay.” He walked slowly to her and raised an eyebrow. “Why are we helping him?”

“It’s a long story. Just help me with him.”

Ravi blinked a few times.

“Ravi! Help me.”

“Right-y, the Ravstar comin’!.” 

She rolled her eyes dramatically.

Ravi lowered himself until he was level with Liv and lifted Blaine’s body, with much effort, off Liv. He gently shoved his hands under Blaine and dragged him to the chair, which Blaine gladly collapsed into.

Liv groaned and stretched her aching hands.

“Explain.”

_** OoOoOo ** _

Ravi lifted the mug to his lips.

“What do you mean you want to help him!?” he said into his coffee, as the steam rose to his face. “As your friend, and your only male protector, I can’t let you do that.”

She stared down at the mug in front of her. “I _can’t_ explain it, but you see him, Ravi. He was,” she said, making small hand movements, “is, I don’t know, realer than I ever seen him. C’mon, Ravi, you can’t deny that!”

He looked at the dozed off Blaine, legs pulled him close to chest, head resting at awkward angle in his lap.

“I don’t buy it.” He glanced at Blaine again. “He _isn’t_ someone we can trust. I know he looks like he is the epitome of great suffering right now, but that’s ‘cause he _is_ playin’ some sort of game. And you _don’t_ want to be the piece he knocks off his board. Because you will be if you endup helping him.”

“I get that.” How was she going to explain that Blaine, the same Blaine who turned her, who locked Major up in the freezer, was _not_ really this guy in their office. She was having a hard time taking it all in, as it was, already. “But we can’t turn him away, now. He needs our help.”

Ravi sighed dramatically and lifted a hand to his forehead. “Oh, the things you make me do, Liv Moore! You should be imprisoned for these vile acts!”

“Ravi, I’m being serious here.” She resisted the urge to roll her eyes. “What are we going to do with him?”

“Well, he does have the cure in him,” he replied back thoughtfully and scrunched up his forehead. “He can be our own little lab rat.”

“Sure, but only, if you’re willing to work through all of his issues with him. And I gotta tell you, buddy, he got a ton. Work your magic.” 

“Oh, no, I’m not doing that.” He waved it off with his hands. “You can help the ‘recovering’ zombie there. I ain’t helping him.”

“But,” she protested weakly, “you’re Ravi and Ravi is always so nice.”

“Only to people who don’t know the real Ravi. I’m definitely the bitchest bitch there is.” 

She laughed. “Tell me about it.”

“Hey!”

“You said it.”

“That isn’t fair.” He folded his arms across his chest. “So not cool.”

“Who says life is fair?” She kicked back her feet on the table, knocking her cup of hot pippin’ coffee down. “Shoot.”

“I’ll get tissues,” Ravi offered, as he got up from his chair.

“You do that.” 

She took her shoes off, trying to drain the coffee out of it.

“Yeah. And you stay with your new friend. Make sure he behaves if he wakes up. If he doesn’t, just yell, and your knight in shining armor, with a white lab coat, and an amazing beard is goin’ to come to your rescue.”

“Do I know this guy? He sounds like my type of guy.”

“He’s everyone’s guy.”

She hmmed 

_Sure, he is, Ravi. Sure, he is._

She walked over to Blaine and felt a wave of serenity hit her when she stared at his innocent, so fragile sleeping face, as if he could break into a thousand little pieces, if she were to touch him right now.

She hoped to god she didn't come to regret this in the near future.

**_ OoOoOo _ **

Blaine started to open his eyes, slowly but surely, and Liv smiled at him, as he started to come around.

“Hey,” she said softly.

He blinked a few times, readjusting his eyes to the light. “Liv?” he said, voice thick with sleep, and flexed his muscles. “That you?”

“Yeah.”

He yawned. “Okay. You know why I’m here?” He looked at her for an answer. “I told you about my predicament, didn't I?”

“Yeah,” she said and gently pushed him back into the chair when he started to get up. “How much do you remember?”

“Not much.” He looked around the office curiously. “How long have I been out?”

“Five or six hours, give or take.”

“Oh,” he mouthed and then something flashed in his eyes. “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

He sunk back into his chair. “For making a scene. I shouldn’t have done that. You and I aren’t friends from what I gather. And I’ve unloaded my issues on you, issues I know nothing about.”

“You can talk to me about it — the memory flashes.”

He laughed softly. “I don’t even know what that was about it.” He ran a hand through his hair. “I’m really sorry for doing this to you. I don’t know if I’m normally like this, or not, but it was wrong of me to behave like a crazy lunatic to a perfect stranger. Or to anyone for that matter.”

“It’s okay,” she reassured him, still a bit wary of his actions. She may had defended him to Ravi, but he was still Blaine, cured or not, amnesic or not, and she wasn't taking any chances.

She wasn't going to turn him away when he clearly needed her help, however, that was a given.

“Thanks.” He offered a small smile that went all the way up to his eyes. “I guess I haven’t really introduced myself to you. I’m Blaine. I’m sure you know this, but new start and all.”

“Yeah.” She tried to laugh but that name still boiled her blood. “And I’m Liv, obviously.”

“Yeah, so the _brain_ thing?”

“It’s a zombie thing. We’re zombies.”

He sent a confused look her way. “Zombies? As in dead-numb-brain-eating zombies?”

“Yep, that’s us,” she said as of matter-of-fact, “except mainstream media has gotten everything expect for the brain part about us wrong. We’re not dumb creatures of the night.”

“Oh? Tell me more,” he pressed on, clearly interested, as he lifted a leg over the other.

“Have you tried hot-sauce with your brain?”

“Well,” he began, voice unconfidently, “I haven’t eaten any brains yet. But I’ll take that into consideration.”

“Hot-sauce makes everything taste good.”

He shrugged. “I don’t think I’ve ever liked hot-sauce.”

“Well, we need to get some brain into you.” She opened the drawer.

“Are you,” he asked, titling his head to see the body, “going to cut the brain out of one of those bodies?”

“Yeah, got to eat somehow, and this is the best way.”

“Oh,” he mouthed.

“It gets better. Trust me, your first brain is always the worst.” She shivered slightly at the memory of her first brain.

“Okay.”

He watched her as she cut open the brain. She was so going to get fired for this, but Ravi didn't mind, so she was good. Too bad she didn't have leftovers from the case this morning. She was so hungry that she ate all of the brain flavored nuggets. 

And that brain was a huge disappointment. The man was average, watched too much TV, but he was just normal. Too normal. Too bad he got killed for his TV’s viewing habits.

She continued searching the drawers for a good body, and Blaine just sat there.

“Is it wrong if I ask you out?”

She stopped dead in her track; the emotions draining from her face.

“Yes,” she said quietly, “very much so.”

“Oh,” he replied, a tint of disappointment in his voice. “That’s alright. You seem like someone I’d like to get to know better.”

“If I weren’t me, and you weren't you, and we weren’t us, then maybe, we would have been something.”

“Oh, okay. I get it. You and I share a pretty bad history.”

“You can say that.”

He laughed and she joined him. Could they actually be something if Blaine hadn’t been so Blaine-like? She didn’t know but that didn’t matter now. She wasn't going to let him in her life, not like that. He would have to change drastically for that to happen.

She looked at him again, and those bright eyes of his, gave her a different impression. _Maybe, they could be something_ , a voice nudged at the back of her head, _if she could cure all of his abandonment issues._

Nah, she pushed the thought out of her head, that was so not going to happen. She wasn’t actually going to considering a world where she and Blaine were an item. 

But then again, it might be nice, if Blaine wasn’t there just to be her rival, but fighting with her to cure this zombie thing.

That wouldn’t actually be such a bad thing.

_Yeah_ , she decided, _she can come to accept that kind of relationship._

“Hey, you okay?”

Blaine’s concerned voice pulled her away from her thoughts.

“Yeah.”

“Okay, you drifted off for a second there.”

“Yeah, I guess I did.”

She continued looking for bodies, and Blaine had joined her, and their hands locked together when they found the perfect body.

Liv could get used to this idea. It wouldn’t be such a bad thing to get involved with him, if he stayed this new and improved Blaine, who had issues, but might be more willing to share them with someone. Mostly her. This could be great for both of them. To find something in each other.

_Yeah_ , she decided and didn't pull away when he moved closer to her until his shoulders hit hers.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Tumblr is the reason this fic is written. Especially old gifsets of Bliv I've created. 
> 
> Come say hi on [tumblr](http://neenabthurman.tumblr.com)


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